Here comes summer!

Being a BBQ, lay around the pool reading Paul Rudnick compilations kind of guy, I love the summer. It’s my favorite time of the year.

Summer marks the return of warm weather and COVERT AFFAIRS. (How does Piper run in heels and still shoot a gun?)  Beaches, baseball, and crappy new reality shows that usually involve idiots doing ridiculous stunts. I think WIPE OUT is proof of Darwinism.

I get to see all my favorite comic book heroes come to life on the big screen. Hey, why doesn’t somebody do a reboot of SPIDERMAN where you don’t leave the theater incredibly depressed? Just a thought.

Summer is the time when you can kick back and mull over the existential questions of the universe -- like how come Adam Sandler keeps starring in movies and what's the big deal about Pinkberry?

The summer of course means – The NBA. After 82 exhibition games to eliminate four teams and Donald Sterling, the playoffs began in the spring, and now we’re finally getting down to the nitty gritty. Don’t you find it odd that the NBA Finals are played in 90 degree weather and the baseball World Series is played in 35 degree conditions?

For TV writers, the day after Memorial Day means going back to work. My heartiest congratulations to all the writers who got jobs on staff this year. Staffing season is Hollywood’s answer to musical chairs on speed.

Meanwhile, there are concerts, events, and movie sequels at night so I never have to watch UNDER THE DOME. Watermelons are cheap. Ice cream tastes better. The Turtles are going on tour. Jon Stewart isn’t taking this summer off. It’s light in Alaska till September. Thongs. The Tony Awards (with Hugh Jackman this year!). Vacation packages to Phoenix are super cheap. Fireworks.  Home fireworks accidents.  EW releases its Holiday Preview issue.  And finally, the All-Star Game without Tim McCarver for once!

Have a great summer. Most of you have had a brutal winter. You deserve the sunshine and warmth. Hopefully Global Warming will subside and a month from now we’re not all saying, “Jesus! When is this summer going to end?”