Fall Movies Preview Part 2

Part 1 was yesterday. How many of these will you be seeing?

TAKEN 2 – Last time it was Liam Neeson’s daughter who was abducted. This time it’s his ex-wife. How high a ransom can you get for an ex-wife?

NOT FADE AWAY – First project by writer/director David Chase since THE SOPRANOS so I can’t wait. All I ask: please have a goddamn ENDING!!

THE PAPERBOY – Nicole Kidman urinates on Zac Efron thereby assuring her an Oscar nomination if not win.  Tom Cruise is probably saying, "If she did that when we were married we'd still be together." 

SEVEN PSYCHOPATHS – The U.S. Dream Team.

HERE COMES THE BOOM – Kevin James mixed martial-arts movie. Haven’t we seen enough of these?

PITCH PERFECT – Set in the no-holds-barred dangerous world of a cappella singing competitions. Tagline: They blend or they end!

ALEX CROSS – Tyler Perry as an action hero. Madea goes badass!

FRANKENWEENIE – Just too easy. I’ll leave this one to you.

THE BIG WEDDING – Robert DeNiro and Diane Keaton play exes who have to make nice at their son’s wedding. Also stars Katherine Heigl so obviously not a comedy.

CHASING MAVERICKS – Gerard Butler in a surfing movie. As long as he has his shirt off expect an A+++ Cinemascore rating from women.

THE SESSIONS – Helen Hunt as a therapeutic sex surrogate (reprising the job she had in MAD ABOUT YOU) who is hired to help a paraplegic lose his virginity. Won the Audience Award at Sundance. But it’s subject matter right in the festival’s wheelhouse.

BUTTER – Jennifer Garner in butter carving contest at the Iowa State Fair. Sounds a little frankenweenie to me.

WUTHERING HEIGHTS – What? Again? And not in 3D?

ATLAS SHRUGGED: PART 2 – Because the reviews of ATLAS SHRUGGED: PART 1 weren’t horrendous enough.

MIDDLE OF NOWHERE – Marriage tested by a prison sentence. Man must decide between his loyal wife at home or Butch in cellblock D.

NOBODY WALKS – Lena Dunham movie so critics will fawn all over it even if it’s worse than ATLAS SHRUGGED: PART 2.

LIFE WITH PI – An Indian boy and a tiger are stuck in a lifeboat. Based on either a novel or Crusader Rabbit.

ANNA KARENINA – Keira Knightley is the latest to play this beloved Russian comic book superhero. The question is: who wants to see Keira Knightley in a costume drama? Who wants to see Keira Knightley in any costume?

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK –  The Jacksonville Jaguars game plan.

LINCOLN – This Steven Spielberg movies takes the radical position that our 16th president was not a vampire slayer.

The finale tomorrow.