Worst new tech invention EVER

In the techno-gadget mad crazy race to keep inventing the next big iThing, Google has come up with the worst idea yet, maybe ever – glasses with an interface right in your line of vision. In the top right corner of your right lens will be a box where you can face chat, get GPS instructions, weather and street information, internet access, and texting.  It's like having the Fox football score all the time!

How many accidents and deaths on the highway will this goofy thing cause? We really need to see who we’re phoning, read restaurant reviews, and do our taxes while driving a two-ton vehicle at 70 m.p.h.?

The commands are voice-activated. And of course we all know how accurate those are. Ask Siri. “Call for new tires please.” “Looking up California retirement places.”

A big feature is that you’ll be able to take instant videos. Other than secret sex tapes (“How come you're putting your glasses at the end of the bed?”) I don’t quite see the major attraction. In the promo video they have people video taping their skydiving and going down roller coasters. How often am I going to go skydiving? 

If you’re not skiing down Everest or surfing a 50 foot wave, what are you going to record? Do you really need video of yourself walking through the mall? “Ohmygod! Here I am looking in the window at Build-a-Bear!” Quick! All your Facebook friends need to see this!

As for the design, they’re space age wraparounds. You can look like LeVar Burton in STAR TREK.

I love new gadgets as much as anybody. I love those tech trade shows where they introduce computers with screens that can flip and become tablets and wristwatch phones that allow you to call the dead. I’m not one of those cranks who say: “What’s wrong with communicating with people through Morse code?” but this product borders on irresponsible.

And how long until they’re showing promos for WHITNEY right onto your glasses?

Plus, what does this do to personal conversations? You’re talking to someone and they stop making eye contact because there's a pitching change at Wrigley Field.  

I know that we all say, “How did I live before smart phones?” But will we really be saying in five years – “How did I live before I had a computer on my face?”

They say they’re still a year or two away from putting these on the market. One voice command they damn well better perfect is: “Glass, employ the airbag!”

So to repeat because I know I'll get a bunch of comments that say I'm just set in my ways and get off my lawn -- my big issue is SAFETY.  

UPDATE:

There's also the invasion of privacy issue.  Some people don't like strangers just videotaping them at will.  Reader Louise brought this to my attention:  A guy thrown out of McDonalds for coming in with essentially a pair of these.  Check it out. 

Here's the promo film.  Whattaya think?


Programming note:  I’ll be guesting on the Stu Shostak Show from 4-6 PT today discussing aspects of my checkered career.  You can also call in.  Imagine Friday Questions but live!